So I have a really juicy blog to post, but I can’t post it just yet.

Lately I’ve been lacking happiness and fulfillment, like always. I had this problem back in ’06 and ’07. I doubt any of my readers have been following me that long.

I’m never satisfied, and I don’t know what fulfills me, or what will fulfill me.

Today I hung with my buddy and 2 of his little girls, it was amazing, I cannot wait till I have kids.

I have enough money to do practically anything right now, but I’m still not happy.

I’m on the search for happiness. Wish me luck.

About my last blog seeking ideas

I have been super busy catching up on work. For everyone who has emailed me with great ideas, please email me again with your ideas if you have a million – multimillion dollar idea that you think would interest me, my inbox seems to have flooded with SPAM.

I have been MIA for the past 2 weeks because I have been working a lot, and taking some me time :)

I’m going to start blogging regularly, kind of like a journal, not everything will be business related.

NOTE: For people who have emailed me, and have not heard a response, I am very sorry, please EMAIL me again! My inbox got flooded with SPAM, and I was not in the mood to dig through the SPAM lol.

Looking for business ideas NOW

Looking for business ideas NOW! Hit me up ASAP. I’ve got a great programmer on lock (I will cover the investment), if you have a million dollar idea, this is the time to speak up. We’ll talk equity ownership if you’ve got an idea that appeals to me, but let’s get moving NOW. Message me immediately if you want to turn your web/iphone app/ipad app/mac app into reality.

Your idea must be a website idea or mobile app idea (android/iphone/ipad)

If you have an idea that integrates all of the above, even better! The world is going mobile, so lets do this.

HIT ME UP ASAP. Use my contact form please.

Maui Journey

My girlfriend and I visited Maui, Hawaii from November 10th – 17th, 2011. I know, the blog is late, ugh, I’m so bad with my online diary! This will have been my 3rd time to Hawaii I think.

It was pretty fucking awesome though! It was my first vacation in a long time, and we had a great time. We saw dolphins, ate awesome food, went to a Luau, and a lot more.
Read more

2012, What To Do This Year

Wow, it’s already 2012. Holy shit. 2010-2011 were not the best of years for me, went through some horrible business times with BEMODEL. Epic launch failures, horrible team member selection, and just missing every single dead line I set. I almost lost my house, but I decided to let go of it, and sell it. I’m in the process of selling it now. I’ll probably walk with zero dollars. I have investors I promised returns within 1-2 years, and now it’s officially been two years. I’ve had 5 roommates in my house, and it was a horrible decision. Things didn’t go as planned, and I feel those 2 years were not as productive as they could of been. The worst feeling is unsuccessfully launching BEMODEL and not getting it to the level I wanted.

I tried so hard to launch a dating book on the side, and find JV’s, and I pushed for it, but the promises were never held up. The people I hired for BEMODEL, oversold me and made me promises, that I should of known were to good to be true. I got ripped off in contracts, I lost a court case and got countersued (my fault) because I missed the court date. My business bank account was garnished by the dip-shit pathetic of a company LiquidFire / Refresh Digital LLC. I was suppose to launch my book, but I postponed it because I feel I have so much more content to put it in it.

And for the worst news, I have zero friends now. I lost all of my friends. I don’t consider anyone a “true” friend (anymore I guess). No one reaches out to me, no one calls just to talk. No one shows appreciation, and no one ever says “hey I want to come visit you.” I have no friends anymore, and haven’t really had anyone to talk to, or just spend guy time with in the last year. Ever since I kicked everyone out of my house, it seems I have gone in a different path, I chose the path to moving forward, and to leave Colorado. The people around me, and the circle I was in, just wasn’t enough for me.

I lost a really close friend because of a business decision I had to make, which was unfortunate. And now for my move, it seems just because I moved, none of my old friends want anything to do with me unless it involves business. Interesting how that works. But life goes on.

But a lot happened in 2010 and 2011. I fucked up a lot and made a lot of business mistakes, meaning I’ve experienced a lot. I met a programmer who made up for the $55k I spent on a local development team. I moved to LA, I moved to Vegas. I just started recently making good money on the side, giving me enough money to put into BEMODEL. I’ve spent over 20k since May 2011 so far on Elance.com for BEMODEL (this includes the various designs/fixes I’ve gone through, iPhone App, Website complete rebuild, Marketing tools, etc).

And now here we are, 2012. I’ve been working my ass off since the day I left Colorado (again) in June 2011, it’s now February 2012. I left Colorado with a friend, because he wanted to move as well, and he had a girlfriend who was waiting for him anyways, so we up and left. I’m kind of where I want to be financially, kind of, but here’s the problem. I wanted freedom, and time to do what I want at the luxury I want, enough money to do anything I want, and help anyone I want. But here I am 24/7 in front of the computer working my ass off, frying my brain, exhausted from sitting in front of a computer all day. How pathetic does that sound? Exhausted from “sitting.”

And when I say constantly working, I mean it’s a bad habit. It’s to the point of me even noticing how bad of a habit it is. It’s past addiction, it’s been programmed into my brain as a subconscious reaction of anytime I am bored, I have to fidget with an electronic device. When an email tone goes off, without hesitation I grab my phone or laptop. There is never not an “hour” with me away from my laptop, iMac, or emailing on my iPhone. The only exception is sleep.

I’m on the computer day and night, I live and breathe it, but I do make decent money once again, about 15-20k a week. I’ve got plenty of money, no friends, and constantly working. It’s not what I was shooting for. Not to mention I’m living in the middle of a desert. There are some positive notes though, I’ve been able to save up, and just kind of think what my next course of action is. I told myself next time I made money, I would invest, but now I keep asking myself, what to invest in? I’ve posted a blog and on Facebook, asking if there was anyone who needed an investor, and got 1 reply.

I’m still stressed because BEMODEL is taking forever, I just don’t get it, why is it that hard for my programmers to just make a design look like the PSD? I’m doing everything I can to hurry and get it done, and it’s almost there, it really is… I’m about to look for a new manager, or CEO, or something to take over my position who knows how to do product launches.

I just bought a used Bentley Continental GT. Not going to buy new cars until I’m very wealthy. I also just bought a Camera setup again, Canon 5D Mark II, with a 135mm f/2L Lens.

(Mine is black too, with cognac interior, and I have the chrome wheels instead)

So for 2012, my goals I believe are this:

1) Find something that truly makes me happy, a passion, or hobby of some kind.

2) Get BEMODEL launched by June, and successful by the end of the year.

3) Continue staying Vegan, and make it all year without a bite of meat or dairy.

4) Start working out more consistently and more often.

5) Live life, live the dream, figure out how to make my current business more automated, so I have free time to enjoy life.

6) Buy/Lease a house in California (moving there on April 26th)

7) Figure out WHAT to invest in.

2010 and 2011 were great years, but years that could of been done so much better. We don’t have any time left to waste, I don’t have any time left to waste. It’s already to late. After only being slightly over 100 days off caffeine, and alcohol, I feel like I’ve learned a lot. It may sound silly, but slightly cleansed almost, as if my vision is more clear, and I realize why you hear people always saying “Why do you need to drink to have fun? (in that annoying voice).” I wasted so much of my health and time on a drug/chemical that was killing thousands of brain cells instantly, and destroying my liver. The worst part is, I know I have a very weak stomach, and I still did it. How this shit is socially accepted as normal is beyond me, but whatever.

This blog actually got me to really think about where I’m at, and what I’m going to do. On another note, please vote for Ron Paul, seriously…

If BEMODEL is not successfully launched by June, I’m hiring someone to completely take over my position, so I can focus on new investment opportunities. It’s not that I’m giving up, it’s just that there comes a time when I start to realize when things pull me down, and really get to me. I realize I may need help, as I cannot do this alone anymore.

And for now, goodnight everyone. Thanks for reading.

BEMODEL.com Is Live

We’re live officially. We’re still working out a bunch of kinks, but it’s up and running! Finally feels like I can breathe a little. Go ahead and sign up, ignore the current sign up and home page, as it will be fixed soon. When you sign up, you’re technically requesting an invite, and you will be approved right away. Shortly, we will have open registration, where you will be able to see the home page and content of the website, do not worry!

We still have a lot to fix though, design wise, just not everything is perfect. So if you see any kinks, report them.

We’re going to be doing a lot of social media marketing, and prizes, giveaways, contests, etc… Starting mid February, so be sure to follow our Twitter and Facebook page to keep up to date with all of that! Here we go!

[quote]One new feature will be released every month up until June 15th, which means we’ll be 100% out of beta.[/quote]

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[button url=”https://www.facebook.com/bemodelofficial” color=”yellow” align=”left” color=”yellow’]Facebook Page[/button][button url=”http://twitter.com/BEMODEL” color=”blue” align=”left” color=”blue’]Twitter[/button][button url=”http://blog.bemodel.com/” color=”pink” align=”left” color=”pink’]Blog[/button] [/cell_text]


BEMODEL Updates & More

Wow, what a roller coaster. I’m sure if any of you have a product you’ve been trying to release, but you just can’t get it perfect, so you keep delaying it, you probably know what I’m going through. You see I had this brilliant vision for BEMODEL, at least I thought so. I wanted to stomp my competitor for the social networking space, and so I’ve been on this fucking mission day and night with designers and developers trying to put together this website. I’ve probably told this story a few times, so I’ll keep this one short and quick.

If anyone recalls BM V1, it was done by a company I hired from India in November 2008, and launched probably around May of 2009. The launch went okay, except for the fact that the programming team we hired sucked, and we got hacked due to SQL Injection. $20k down the drain.

Then I got three investors in January of 2010 to build BM V2 which didn’t go as planned, the functionality nor the design was there, so we didn’t market or try to sell the product, why would we market a told we think sucks? Launched in May 2010 I think. The team we hired fucking sucked AGAIN. So now I’m out of all the investors cash right? What do I do? $150k spent on the wrong people, man if only I could rewind time, but it doesn’t work that way, lessons learned. I’ve been through so much hiring people for jobs, that I feel I have an entire new 2-3 chapters to add to my damn book.

I find a new programmer off Elance for $32.40 per hour, and he’s amazing, I hired him in May of 2011, and we got the initial V3 beta ready in October of 2011. It’s now December 2011, almost 2012. I have been paying this programmer out of my own pocket, I’ve been paying a series of designers, iPhone guys, short-term CSS guys, etc… BM V3 was almost there, the functionally of a social network is there, and it worked great, the design was … okay … When does aesthetics and user experience come into play, how important is it? When do I let go, and say fuck it, it’s good enough, let’s just launch already. My problem is that, I can never just say fuck it, I want it to be perfect. I didn’t like the design we had, because the design was lacking something. I know there is a point and time where you have to realize that hey, my product is good enough, and people want it, you need to get it out there, or else you will NEVER get it out there, and you will just keep procrastinating. But I DO NOT feel like that YET.

But now I do. I have finally discovered, and finally found “purpose” for BEMODEL. I was at a Tony Robbins event, and he said something brilliant to me. I can’t quote him exactly, but it was something like this:

“If your product or service isn’t working in this recession/depression/current economic crisis, maybe you need to rethink what your business can do for customers. Come up with a NEW service or NEW product.”

That’s exactly what I went for. Fuck the old business plan of social networking, fuck it completely. It’s still going to be there, but that’s just the fucking surface. I spoke with some respected photographers, did a shit load of research, and just thought to myself 24/7 about what the fuck can I do, to turn this around. Now, that’s no exaggeration when I say 24/7, I’m sick in the head. I care more about business, and fixing my debts with my investors and delivering what I promised than I do life itself, more than anything… I could easily pay them off with my own cash from Email marketing I have on autopilot now, I’m only making 30k a month, but within 6-12 months, I could pay them off. But I am FUCKING determined to make BEMODEL work.

So I hired a new designer, haha. I’d still like to consider this BM V3 since I’m still using the same programmer and we’re only in the beta stages. A designer for the iPhone App, and the website. That’s right, an iPhone App finally. Expected launch date is 3 months from now. I say that conservatively, so hopefully sooner, but I hate giving timeframes now, because it’s always one thing or another with the teams I hire, and nothing is really ever done when you want it to be, so we’ll see.

As far as what I have coming with BEMODEL is so simple, but exactly what will turn this around. I probably spend an average of 2 – 6k a month on BEMODEL. I can’t even save fucking money because I keep spending it on BEMODEL, because I am either A) that fucking stupid, or B) that fucking determined. Last month looks like this for business:

Some updates on me

For the curious ones, here is how I’ve been doing:

* A lot of you have been asking what have I’ve been doing, a lot of it is email marketing and some search marketing, the majority is email. As far as products, my own e-books, and pushing finance ads.

It looks great, and it is great, but with more income, comes more expenses, bigger bills, and more for me to spend on BEMODEL. So really I’m not doing the best job of saving, but I’m trying as hard as possible. For the negative nancies who are about to say I’m just as stupid as last time. I haven’t bought cars, houses, or much toys, it’s been all into one hell of a risky investment (BEMODEL). The higher the risk, the higher the return right? Fuck a 401k/SEP-IRA/Roth-IRA right now, I’m only 24. And at the current rate of income, I’m on track for about 30-40k/mo. Slowly building my way back up, but to be honest, I’m not fully satisfied, because the last three years of my life has been dedicated to BEMODEL, and I have, in my eyes, have let 3 investors down thus far.

Vegas is okay, it’s tough with no friends, but I have my beautiful Girlfriend who takes great care of me, and we’re both on the Vegan challenge together, and tomorrow marks exactly 30 days of no meat, dairy, eggs, etc… I’ve lost 19 pounds so far, my highest was 197 right before we started, and now I’m 178. Give or take a few fluctuating pounds, so about 17 pounds I’ve lost in reality. It’s insane really, how much weight I’ve lost from my face. I can go on and on about how much better I feel, and how much more sensitive my taste buds are to plant foods, and how great they taste now. But I’ll post another blog on this later.

We have only gone to the strip one time since I’ve been living here, and have only gone out once to the clubs. I’m not really a club guy unless I have a group of friends to hangout with, otherwise it’s boring as poop to me. Poop might be more fun actually. Well that’s just a little update on BEMODEL and myself. Leave comments or questions below, I reply to every single one!

My Almost-Vegan Challenge

That’s right. I’m officially Almost-Vegan. They say it takes three weeks to make your body feel like it’s almost necessary to do it, or in better words, easier to do it. Tony Robbins on the last day of his 4 day (50 hours of talking) event, decided to pitch his thoughts on health, and oh boy was he convincing, but absolutely right. Before anything, we must take care of our bodies and feel at 100% right? Because if our bodies aren’t how we want them, or if we feel like shit, how are we going to get motivated to build our business? Well, he spent the next 10 hours straight educating us on what you all pretty much know… What we’re eating is complete and absolute crap. Fast food, eating out even, the liquids we consume, and so on. Everything I was eating was 100% horrible even when I thought I was “eating good.” Anything from man-made chemical poison, to processed fats (frozen foods, fast foods, snacks), to refined whites (white breads,pastas,sugars,rice). He broke it down so well, and explained to us how everything we’re putting in our body is so bad for us. We are poisoning ourselves and our children from the day they’re born. Fuck I could go on and on because I love health and food. It’s almost a second passion of mine, it’s just so difficult to stop what we been conditioned to love, fatty chemically cooked food and liquids.

After his 10 hour speech, I was sold after his meat speech, oh god… He didn’t even talk about the slaughterhouses, it was all about how bad meat really is for us, and where the flavor comes from. Uric acid in the animals blood as their slaughtered, and the blood is not fully drained from the animals. Did you know the flavor of meat we’re enjoying oh so much is the flavor of the animals piss (Uric acid). Oh god and the dairy part! You know, and have known we’re the only animals on this planet drinking breast milk as adults! Every other animal on this planet stops drinking breast milk after their infant stages, and do you see other animals drinking other animals breast milk? No, just us. I’ve even known this, just figured the FDA was in our best interest, or just never pictured my physical fucking mouth sucking on Cow titties, sucking milk from their udder, not to mention the chemicals they add to milk actually prevents you from “getting strong bones,” it actually sucks the calcium straight from you, so you’re not really even getting the calcium benefits from milk, it’s hurting you. Oh god, it almost makes me sad to even think about how we’re poisoning ourselves every day.

So he pitched his 10 day challenge, which he didn’t even mention the word Vegan/Vegetarian, he just simply pointed out what’s bad for our bodies, which is very close to Vegan, except fish is allowed. Anyways, I was sold, and he gave us a 10 day challenge. I’m now on day 21 without high fructose corn syrup (or any refined sugar), refined whites (only brown), alcohol, caffeine, dairy, meat, eggs, or any food/liquids with pesticides/added hormones/or fancy ass chemicals that are linked to cancer, which is pretty much everything I was eating. That’s right, I’m almost 1 month completely sober of any fucking drug, and it was tough. Really tough, those first 10-15 days I was having some intense cravings, and I had to eat a salad…

I have drank 100 ounces of water every single day for the last 21 days as well, half my body weight in ounces. The first 2 weeks was a living hell, let alone we were in fucking Maui 4 days later, and we made a promise with Tony to commit to the 10 day challenge, so we did even while on our 8 day vacation. Fuck was it hard, I almost cheated quite a few times, because my conditioning was to crave yummy fucking fatty greasy acidy foods. So we went to the grocery store out there and stocked up on all organic food in our little hotel, and cooked for ourselves every day which really included only salads and fruits, haha.

When I got home from Maui, I deleted/trashed EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE and I stocked up my fridge with ONLY and ALL organic foods, only brown rices/flours/breads (nothing refined). All organic canned veggies, frozen veggies/fruits, fresh fruits, fresh produce, tofu substitutes for sandwich meat, veggie patties for hamburgers, etc… And now I feel like a fucking Vegan pro, because I just made the most awesome Vegan Gyros with my own homemade Vega Tzatziki sauce. It is not even a thought anymore to crave restaurants, fast food, bad foods, sodas, coffee, etc…

I even switched my shower head to a 5-stage filter so I only shower in filtered water, just google what you’re showering in. I switched my deodorant to an organic one, because did you know you’re rubbing “Aluminum” into your armpits? Google that too, it’s linked to cancer. I asked myself if all this shit is linked to cancer, why the fuck is it in everything we buy? Pick some books up, and educate yourself. Tony changed my life, not just the Vegan part, the first 3 days were insane. I changed all my soaps, shampoos, conditioners, laundry detergent, dish soap, EVERYTHING to organic. I only drink filtered water from a 5-stage filter, not a 2-stage like Brita. Now some of you might think I’ve gone overboard, but hey, if I’m going to test this theory of my immune system boosting, not needing to pop pills for every little problem, and most likely never getting colds/flus again. I’m going to go all the way.

How do I feel? Well the first 2 weeks I felt like fucking shit without caffeine, or wine, or my fatty foods. But now I wake up bright ass fucking early, 7AM every morning feeling ALIVE, ready to work, ready to do anything. I start to get tired around midnight, but feel great throughout the entire day, minus the first 2 weeks. I feel myself getting healthier, and I feel better about myself, oh and I’ve lost 14 pounds of FAT. I was 195-197 before Tony Robbins. Now I’m 181-182. Now that I have the Vegan eating on lockdown, and it doesn’t feel difficult, it’s time to start my workout regimen. Fucking fresh veggies, fruits taste like fucking amazing to me. Meat smells like ass now in the stores, and people smell fucking horrible. Not needing caffeine or alcohol to be ready to thrive during the day is quite fucking nice. I use to laugh at Vegans (not literally, but at the thought of it), I would ask them how the fuck do you not eat meat? Now I know, it’s easy, it’s poison, it’s not to meant to pass through or digestion system, it’s so bad on your body and digestion system.

Now I’m not truly Vegan, because I still eat fish such as salmon, tuna, etc, for the omegas, and other health benefits. I still wear clothes made from animals, lol. So it’s more of, I follow what common sense says to eat now, not what we’ve been programmed to eat and conditioned to stuff our faces with.

What I completely avoid:
White anything (sugars,flours,breads,pastas)
Fake sugars (high fructose, corn syrup, etc.)
Animal meats (cow,lamb,chicken,pork,buffalo,etc.)
Processed fats (fast food, most restaurants, fried food, frozen packaged foods-unless organic,trans fat,hydrogenated oils)
Dairy completely (milk,cream,butter,yogurt,cheese)
Anything from animals (eggs)

What I can eat: (I choose to eat organic only at least 95% of the time)
Brown rice, sugar, pastas, breads, tortillas
Potatoes! Sweet, red, whatever
Soy/Tofu substitutes (soy milk, soy meats, soy based fake dairy products, soy cheese, etc.)
Almond/Rice substitues (rice milk/cheese, almond milk/cheese, etc.)
Almonds, nuts, etc.
All kinds of other fancy shit, agave nectar, flax, cane sugar, yeast
Skys the limit, I just need to read the ingredients, and make sure it doesn’t have processed fats (trans fat, hydrogenated oils), meat, dairy, fake sugar, anything refined, or any weird unknown mad-made chemicals, hormones, or pesticides (LOL good luck on that right?)

I have made a lot of dishes I enjoyed in the past, in a Vegan way, and it’s fucking delicious. If any of you are considering or have been considering eating better, because you care about what you put into your body. I strongly advise you do it now, because it will to late 5-15 years from now when you’ve been stuffing the same chemicals in your body every single day for years on end.

Well there you have it, my almost-Vegan challenge! Below are just a few samples of things my girlfriend and I made.


* Salmon, sweet potatoes, kale salad

Vegan Burger

* Rice cheese, Vegan mayonnaise

Vegan Enchiladas

* Homemade enchilad sauce, corn tortillas, rice cheese, homemade Guacamole, vegan sour cream

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